Ref. No. 39/1064
In the name of the Allah the most Gracious the most Merciful
The answer to your question is as follows:
(1) If it is done in an uncontrollable excitement, then it maybe allowable. (2) Foreplay is allowed but taking oral sex is not allowed. (3) It is allowed but not better.
And Allah knows best
Darul Uloom Waqf Deoband